Lucid Dreaming

If you know me, maybe you know what I'm about to mention & maybe you don't. Every once in a while during sleepy-time I go through something that I have come to understand is called sleep paralysis. Basically, it is when a person becomes conscious during the part of sleep where limbs are unmovable. Being unable to move legs & arms during sleep is normal, because otherwise people would be flailing about all the time to act out their dreams & potentially hurt themselves. However, becoming aware of it is not quite so common & falls under the catagory of parasomnias. It's not so dangerous as say, sleep-walking, but it can be damn scarey. Some people experience weightlessness & lucid dreaming, but that has not been my experience. What happens is that I am either about to nod off or wake up & in that between-state I notice that I can't move my arms & legs. This is followed by feeling as though my body is being weighted down. First time or few this happened, it scared the shit out of me. I researched & it's still unsettling when it happens, but the fear is less. Even though I have a basic understanding, I still get that feeling like a presence is there dispite the knowledge that I know there is not. Also the fear of being pressed deeper... In any case, I do my best to (literally) shake it off, maybe try to speak. One time I was lucky enough to have someone in the room to snap me out of it. Basically, wake up to being actually awake.

Last night I had a dream, that for a while I wasn't sure was a dream. I was lying in bed, unsure if I was experiencing sleep paralysis of a sort, but it was different than usual. For one thing, I wasn't being weighted at all (possibly lighter, but I wasn't sure). I did have the sleep tingles in my arms, whatever the cause, it's why I can't do anything major with me hands when I first wake up (like writing or gripping heavy things). Anyhow, there was the distinct feeling of a presence. I one point, I even recall pulling my pillow to hold against the invisible force, which was very much there. The whole thing went on for a little while, but there's not much to say about it, since not much happened. I will say however, that I know for a fact this was a dream, at least in part because my pillow was under my head when I woke up. The way everything went, I'm not really positive as to whether or not certain parts of my brain was awake. I questioned how much was a dream as I dreamt it. I can't really say it was all that scarey, at least compared to when I awaken in paralysis-mode, but it was certainly odd.

Jeepers Creepers - Tales of the Past

Alright, so it's late & why not post some old stories of creepers...

If you don't already know, I live in the city. If you don't know where, doesn't really matter, but for arguement's sake SoCal. My old neighborhood was none to great. It wasn't the worst, but I sure as hell wouldn't want to wander around at night by myself.

I remember back on W block... I lived in an apartment complex, locked gates at the front & alley. Anyhow, I was hanging with some friends outside. One of my female friends brings me over to the gate to talk with some guy hanging with his friends out there. I got a very bad vibe off him & I was not pleased with her in the least for telling him who I was and dragging me over there. Well, I forget the name now, but he was basically a self-proclaimed thug. Before asking about my interests and anything else that says to me "I am curious about who you are." He asks if I have a boyfriend (and likely the player lines, I don't recall when was the first time he did this). When the question of relationship status &/or "damn you look fine" comes up before well... absolutely anything else, all this says to me is "I want to fuck you." That NEVER works with me. If anything, it makes me nervous. Anyhow, yeah, I wanted to kill my friend. After that time, I'd seen that guy around on occasion. One of those times was when I was getting out of the pool (probably for the bathroom)... dripping wet in a 2-piece... Daytime, with witnesses, but yeah still nervous (& wondering who left the damn gate unlocked). The last time I remember was when I was walking home from the bus-stop with a male friend of mine (fairly big) who lived next to the apartments. Well, he decided to go off to one of his friend's house instead. About a block & a half, no big deal right? Fuck no, wrong! Go about half a block & across the street I hear that asshole with his pals yelling obscenities about me joining them. It has been long enough to forget exactly what they said, but I can tell you it wasn't polite. I was damned glad I wasn't on their side of the street & they didn't come to me or that probably wouldn't have ended well. I could not get across the intersection (damned cars & no traffic lights) & home quick enough.

Some years later I lived on a different street, but same general neighborhood... There was a main street known for having prositutes (a very long road). I took a bus on that street on a regular basis. I recall a time I was walking home in plain jeans and an oversized sweatshirt. Middle of the day, nobody else on the sidewalk, & I hear "Are you on the job? Do you want to make $100?" from some asshole who just stopped further down on the corner. He repeats it once & I keep walking, pissed but not stupid.

There has been twice that I recall & in 2 places... I don't know if the guys were fucking morons or if I just kept my distance to make things too risky for 'em to try anything. I will just give this advice to you guys. Never hit on a lady from a van, especially with darkened or lacking windows behind the driver's seat. Also, never walk up to someone in a van in which you can not see what is going on in the back. Not only kids & ladies, but guys too. I don't care if they're asking for directions, yell to them.

Why I don't take uber early shifts without a ride... It was a different area than I live now, but it can happen anywhere. It was freezing cold winter. I was walking to the bus in the early pre-dawn morning when I walk past someone with no pants (just a sweatshirt with a hood on their head and hands over the genitals). They weren't threatening, (& although odd) I figured perhaps they got drunk & locked out of thier house or something. To be honest, at that time I couldn't tell if it was a dude or chick. Some time later, same thing. Ok, I'm thinking, "not a coincidence, they've gotta be mental". I start using the next block over for my path to the bus. Some time later, I run into the dude again. Logic dictates that a person might be scared in that situation, but really I was just pissed off. I felt like if he tried anything, I would have beat the shit out of him. Equipped with a cell & spray, once more I ran into the guy. This time he walked & talked (really short, had a beard). In a pathetic almost cartoony voice he said, "I won't hurt you. I just want to be your sex slave." I pull out the pepperspray & not being use to it, my aim was rather terrible. Then he says, "Please don't hurt me. I just want to be your sex slave." He stops following before the end of the block & I knew he wouldn't follow (there was nothing to hide behind on the freeway overpass sidewalk). After that, I had a ride to work.

All true shit. I tend to keep my ass out of trouble. However, sometimes trouble just comes out of nowhere. When that happens, one has to keep their wits about them.

mini-story of the mini-stereo and a mini-hat

Copy-Pasta of a true story of mine, because the first location will get deleted at some point and because not everyone uses that form of social media anyway. One day I felt like listening to music in the livingroom. I don't remember what I was doing in there, doesn't matter (I probably should have left this part out, but it's my story. Fuck you, I'll tell it how I want.). I take my portable stereo into the livingroom, plug it in, put in a cd and attempt to play it. It refuses to work. I open it, remove/replace the cd, close, hit play. Every time the cheeky thing tells me "no". I mean this literally, because it forms the word where the 2 digital track numbers are after it acts like it's trying to work. (Joe was there. He thought that part was funny.) Knowing this cd has worked before, I think "what's different?". Besides that it's in a different room & plugged into a different wall socket, the only difference was a small clip hat I usually leave resting on top of the mini-stereo. I know this has no technical significance, but I get it & put it on the thing anyway. You know what happened next? It played the cd. That electrical bastard just wanted its hat. I laughed so hard. It was a while ago, but I'm pretty sure I had the giggles for at least 20 minutes.

A Guide to Playing With Looney on Team Fortress 2

I don't expect more than a few lurkers will actually read these random typings. Therefore, I seriously doubt revealing anything that is obvious to people who play with me on a regular basis will cause me any trouble in having my ass dominated in-game. In the case that it does give anyone the upper hand, consider me someone who likes a challenge or at least does on some level live up to the self-imposed-title (not name) of being the vintage lunatic.

You could check my game stats simply by looking up my username on steam or in the fug stats... and although it would tell you quite a bit, it doesn't tell you everything there is to know about playing with me. I do like to keep 1 of every weapon, so nothing is set in stone in anything I tell you, but I do have my favorites. My style/strategy changes from time to time based on who/where I play. Also, switching things up is fun as well.

Engie:
If you happened to click either of those links I set there, you'll know my primary class is engineer. If you happen to see an engineer with a pale pink ten gallon hat, chaps with matching fringe, & accompanied by a little bear (or cat), then you are most likely either looking at a spy or me. I do believe in playing friendly with other engies, unless you are not on my team. Either way, I will smack your shit with my wrench. Yes, I do turtle near my sentry, when I'm not using the gunslinger, or scoping out a new location to turtle from. If we are playing friendly/goofy & you don't see any sentries... keep out of the intel room.

My Setup:
~Pomson 6000
~Short Circut or Wrangler (stategy-based)
~#1 Southern Hospitality (great for a bloody mess), #2 gunslinger (better mobility), or #3 Eureka Effect (typically on defense only)

Response translations:
"Yeah, you got 'em all." or "Yup, all our sentries are down." actually means "You missed one." or "You did get 'em all, but I'm a fast builder."
"You missed one." translates to "You got 'em all." or "You missed one, dummy."
"DAMMIT!" means "You were successful." (Not to be confused with a less emotional "dammit" which could mean damn near anything. Also note, this can be applied to any class I use.)

Pyro:
This is a former favorite that use to be #1 for the longest time. I'll play when I'm in the mood to burn things, but there's not much to be said about my stategy. I kinda suck at pyro dodgeball, but I can reflect projectiles now & again. My setup for everything changes regularly, except my secondary is typically shotgun. I'll also play pyro-dressup, but if you see Colonal Sanders trying to fry some chicken asses, that's probably me.

Soldier:
I may have this listed third, but it is one of my primary classes to play. I don't necessarily play wreckless, so much as calculatedly wreckless. My favorite death is taking someone out with me. If I can do this with a taunt on an unaware player, even better. I'll be the one with the purple tyrant's helm. I do know how to rocket-jump, but occasionally, my coordination is a bit lacking. If I giggle over the mic when we both die, that just means I'm having fun.

My Setup:
~Liberty Launcher
~Gunboats
~Equalizer (disiplinary action, pain train, or escape plan may be substituted for stategic purposes)
Also, rocket-jumper/mantreads/equalizer setup I find fun for playing Trolldier, but only when I feel I can pull it off (even if I really can't).

Spai:
Spies are sneaky & a spy that's not, is a dead spy. My primary setup is the Saharan Set. I do enjoy the near-silence of de-cloaking behind my prey, killing them in one hit, & (sometimes) listening to them complain how I scared the crap out of them. Because of this, I also switch watches between lives, to keep people guessing. If dealing with turtle-engineers or razorback-snipers, I'll likely change my setup completely, but I don't think it's consistant enough to bother saying what that setup is. When I'm in the mood, I'll use a french accent over the mic. This includes mocking opponents, bluffing, and French cursing. The real question is which one I am doing at any given time.

Scoot:
I use this when I want to play fast-paced. I can either play 'seriously' or melee-only killing. Melee killing tends to mean I'm experimenting with different setups, but basically I'm mostly running around smacking people with whatever the hell I happen to have in my hand. Serious or not, if I see an unaware sniper (or any class) & I have the right melee weapon, I do feel very compelled to taunt that person back to thier respawn. Also, I wear the old skull.

The "Serious" Setup:
~Force-a-Nature
~Pretty Boy's Pocket Pistol (previously Bonk)
~Atomizer

Doktor:
I heal, use blutsauger, ubersaw, & wear the blighted beak with the grimm hatte. What else is there to say?

Snipper:
I have different setups, but I don't often play with a serious one with this class (except, maybe on balloon levels). Huntsman/lemonade/bushwacka is fun enough. I wear the Anger & spy voodoo doll (not really unique, but I like it).

Demo:
I typically use oldschool demoman with random melee. Ocassionally going demo-pirate for shits 'n giggles. Jumper demo on certain maps...

Hoovy:
His fat ass is so slow, I have to be in the mood to play this class. Not much to say... Shoot people or punch them. Wear an iron jaw with random hat or bald. Yup.

Let's Play a Game

I am a gamer and have been ever since I was gifted a Sega Game Gear with Columns. This wasn't the first game I'd played, but it was the first one I played regularly and I now had my own little gaming system in which I could try new games.

The First:
I'm pretty sure the first game I ever played was Tetris at my friend's house on the NES. They also had a Mario game, but it seemed hard & I wasn't really into gaming yet. As you know, this game is for all skill levels, nice & casual. I've found myself playing it on different computers years later. Can anyone argue that this is probably the most successful or at least most well-known & played video game of all time? There have probably been more spin-offs on this game than anything.

The Sega Years:
I started with a Game Gear & later aquired a Genesis. During that time, I'd played many games. My biggest phase of fandom happened to be with the whole Sonic the Hedgehog series. ...or at least everything that came out back then. I even enjoyed the comics & cartoons. I also got started on fighting games with Street Fighter & Mortal Kombat, playing with friends for long periods of time.

N64:
Aside from a few random encounters with games at friends' homes, it wasn't until I got a Nintendo64 that I got into Nintendo games. Mario64, ok fun. Zelda, now that game I got hooked into & have since played bits of the other games (including getting all the way to the end of Twilight Princess on someone else's Wii). Super Smash Bros... More Mortal Kombat... Killer Instinct... Goldeneye! During the Summer I remember spending whole days with friends over, just playing for hours. I suppose that was the first first-person-shooter game. Single player was ok, but multiplayer was always best on that. I can't say I would enjoy it like I use to, unless I could find a player who wouldn't get thier ass kicked sideways, even while I'm holding back. ;o)

I went for a while not interested in the latest/greatest games. Casual is another story, but I'll get back to that.

Wii:
I never had my own (not yet, if I get one later). However, I've spent enough time in front of one, so I thought it worth mentioning. Animal Crossing I find highly addictive. It's relaxing & still fun to just collect all sorts of things. It's pretty much a game about hoarding. I've enjoyed bits of all sorts of other games, but I can't think what else to mention...

Gamecube:
I got one as a present, after it was already old. I have plenty of games, but unfortunately, many have gone unplayed due to pretty much a lack of interest. The top 2 played have been Chibi Robo (aww, cute lil robot) & Animal Crossing... which I lost interest in right around when mom got her own memory card & learned about the perks of playing back & forth between 2 towns. This makes neighbors move around, so I can't keep track on 'em (plus my house was already full from the hoarding).

PS2:
I bought this with Guitar Hero controllers & a few games from a neighbor. I later got Tekken & DDR (plus 'universal' dancepad). This is pretty much my Arcade system. Few games, but mainly used for Guitar Hero. DDR doesn't get played as much as I thought I would. I get hot too soon & the dancepad moves slightly on the carpet, unlike the solid arcade sort.

PC:
I don't find myself sitting in front of console games so much anymore. For starters, they require the tv. This means somebody else can't be using it. The first games I'd played were simple casual games... puzzles, tetris clones, etc. One that I really got addicted to was called "Slay". This was a simple strategy game that used the simplest of sprites. It was probably an indie game... Anyhow, it was a game about conquering all the hexigons on the screen that represent land. It was completely strategy, no animations of "slaying" or anything. I've never much liked other land-conquiring games, but I like that one. Presently, I'm a steam-user & my main two games are Team Fortress & Portal. More specifically #2 on both of those. Portal is unique, so I like. TF2, is online multiplayer fps, which features item hoarding, & characters with character.

The Sad Alien Dream

I had a bit of an odd dream last night. Technically, in the morning, because it made me sad when I woke up. I don't remember names or faces in the dream, so I don't suppose the meaning of it actually has to do with the people around me in life.

Anyhow, in this dream there are aliens and they take over society, because of their superiority in technology & physicality. There was chaos and people were taken as test subjects, separated from their lives and the people they once knew. Perhaps some in a catatonic stasis. I remember something about mixing genetics between the humans for breeding or experimenting. Later I remember being relatively free to roam around. They still ruled, but the humans were more like servants or rats, rather than being stuck in some cell or capsule. A lot of time must have passed, I'm not sure how much or if I was awake for all of it. Anyhow, I was in search of my love that I had become separated from when the aliens came. I found a friend during this time & talked (I don't remember more on that). We parted and eventually, I found my love. Unfortunately, this was not a happy time, because he had moved on after we got lost. He had a wife & kids, 3 I believe, blond. (There are some gaps in memory...) I think it was sometime after this that I did some sneaky tactics against the aliens, during their sleep. I think I had allies with me, but I can't remember more details there.

The strangest part of this dream for me was the whole aliens part. I don't know if I've EVER dreamed about aliens before. The thing I'm thinking now is that maybe this has to do with that Polybius game. Heck, I didn't even believe everything about that crazy shit about the legend behind it. I may consciously see that crap flashing on the screen, but things go so fast I can't make most of it out. It's not just words either... Maybe it did get into my subconscious. Anyhow, that wasn't my first thought about the dream. My first thoughts were along the lines of "boohoo" & "stop thinking about it, it was just a dream".

The Spy of my Dreams

I have a friend who has told me to dream of dead spies on more than one occasion (after a night of playing TF2 & then going to sleep), so in that sense this dream is ironic. The night before last, I had a dream that I was a spy.

I forgot details... of course, that always happens. Anyhow, I remember I was causing some trouble, as all good spies do. Someone I caused trouble for enlisted a pyro's help to scope me out, after I turned invisible. Being in hot-water there (minus the water), I decided it was of the utmost importance to hide. I found a men's restroom & decided to hide out there for a bit, until the heat was off. It was a big one with stalls & such. Also, it was empty of people. I disguised as an enemy demoman, so that anyone who might have come in there wouldn't immediately alert their team to my location. I scoped out the large room. There was an open doorway. I hadn't left, but there was a lady out there who decided to chat me up. I don't remember what class she was, but I got the feeling she thought I was attractive. Of course, being of the opposite team, I wanted her gone. However, I also had to play the part of 'charming' mr. demoman to keep suspicions off. I really wanted her gone, because by this time I had to pee & being as how I wasn't really a guy, faking something so basic might prove difficult.

I don't recall anything further in the dream. Usually the urine-dreams are because I need to wake up and go do it, but not so in this one. I haven't thought about interpretations for this dream, only that the ironies with it make it slightly funny.